Cuddles and Stories

I have agonized over the bedtime routine for the past few months now. Should I be making him go to bed on his own? Is it okay that I lay with him until he falls asleep, or will it create a child that can't go to bed on his own later in life? So many questions and it seems everyone has an answer for you, yet what is right for you, is only something you know.

Before we put Matthew into a bed, we got him to the point, where he was able to go to bed by himself. Now that he's in a big boy bed, we reverted back to having someone lay with Matthew.

It's a catch 22 for me. On one hand, I feel like laying with Matthew is some of the best quality time that I get to spend with him. He talks so much right now! Tonight, he told me how Grandma lives in Saskatoon, How Grandpa says "goin' on", that Big Grandpa wears a hat, that Grandma and Grandpa brought a suitcase to our house, that Daddy takes Nana home, that Miss Ann (his Saturday teacher) does painting and on and on... his little mind must just be spinning!

On the other hand, some nights, it's 9:30 before I get him to fall asleep. By that time, my evening is done too. I don't feel like finishing the dishes, I don't even feel like blogging most nights. That disappoints me, because my blogs are almost like an online journal for me, and often times I have so much to say at night, but no energy to say it.

So, I've come to a compromise now. We have our normal bedtime routine, which consists of warm milk in bed while we read stories, then tooth brushing and lights out. Mommy, and sometimes Daddy lay with Matthew for a little while, while Matthew rolls around and talks to us and plays with our hair and everything else under the sun. Then Mommy pretends that she is going to sleep for a few minutes, while she listens to Matthew talk to himself (my favourite part)... and then if he doesn't fall asleep, I have to tell him it's time for Mommy to go to her own bed. (not my favourite part).

For some reason, it's no big deal for Daddy to go to his own bed, but when I say it's time for me to go, the big sobs come out. So, I go anyway, stand at the top of the stairs and feel like crap while he cries, usually for exactly 30 seconds. Then he's quite and usually falls asleep within minutes.

So slowly, he's learning to go to bed on his own, yet, I don't have to let go of the bedtime cuddle routine just yet. It works for me.